Teachers and Television

Radio Hayah spoke with Jaz Ampaw-Farr about her role as an encourager to teachers.

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  - I'm with Jaz Ampaw- Farr who was a contestant on the TV show the Apprentice and is here in The Holy Land , What are you doing here in the holy land  ?

 - Well I have the honor of working with the Anglican international school in Jerusalem because my day job is a literacy consultant and I am really passionate about reading, writing and spelling and getting as close to brilliant as we can, they were my own tickets out of poverty, not just physical poverty but mindset poverty, so if we can get children by the end of Primary school really owning the skills they need then we can make a huge difference and here at the Anglican international school they have a great vision for making sure that every child, no matter which school they come from or which language they speak or which year they are in get the best that they can give, Quality education in English language so that they can use that to go on and fulfill that potential, so I am just really supporting with some funky ideas and a bit of systematic planning for that.

 - Who inspired you? Tell us a little bit about your story, your childhood.

- Yeah well my childhood, I always think it’s a sad story, I always think if I was going on  the TV show The  X Factor in the UK, Which is like Arab Idol the singing competition and all the contestants have really sad back stories and that’s what makes them great contestants, I don't want to particularly win a singing competition but I do have a great back story, I am mixed race so I lived with my mum who was white and my dad was unknown, Quite a turbulent childhood, she married a man who  was very violent and abused us, Sexually, Physically, verbally, we were in an out of Foster care, (Which is when another family looks after you for a time because it's not safe to live at home), Myself and my 5 brothers and sisters, Lots of times and what is interesting is throughout this time even though I felt very alone and very afraid for my life, I didn't believe I was valuable, I felt worthless, I was scared all the time, I was in School and in school I had, fortunately  completely   blessed I had 5 teachers, because I worked out I had about 100 teachers between attending nursery school and attending teacher training college  and of them 5, I had one in each kind of key stage, One in each stage as I went through really just, they did the academic stuff but they were very in connecting with me as a person, they were about engagement, they were about believing in me, about valuing me, even when I didn't believe in myself, I would say "I can't do it" and they would say "What would it look like if you could" I would say "I am rubbish I am never going to get this right"  and they would say "I believe in you and I am right here."  And because I never had anyone else the power of someone just standing shoulder to shoulder with you repeatedly kind of kept that flame of hope burning that one day I would maybe one day escape my horrible life and even when we went into foster care and we were sort of rescued and taken away, that was about 8 years old, things were still very difficult but all through secondary school I had these people who believed in me and invested in me and it made me want to not let them down and I actually went on in the end to become a teacher because of their input because I wanted to honour what they did, they showed me what a great adult was , as far as I was concerned the great panicle of being a great human was to be a teacher and to be compassionate and have empathy and to always hold children with an unconditional positive regard and so that is what I set out to become.

 - And teachers changed your life !

 - Completely, they are transformation agents, here is the crazy thing, what I do now is actually because I have had a fantastic opportunity to go on the TV show the Apprentice and get fired in the first week, becoming a failure expert and I remember when it happened I thought I'm just going to hide, fake my own death and hide away in a desert Island (Laughing) because it is so embarrassing, Because every child I have ever taught, every parent I know, all my friends and family, everyone is going to see that I failed, but actually I started to embrace it and felt well failure is just, it's like a ladder, every step is a failure and you need plenty of step to get to the top to succeed, so I kind of started talking about that and I do lots of talks in business but my favorite keynotes are in education to remind teachers, I know you are tired, I know it's hard work, I know you are paid a really low wage but you have the most amazing job in the world because you are literally transformation agents, you interrupt trajectories     by just being there, by the little things you do, by showing up with your whole self every day and you change lives, you change futures and you should own that Hero status and celebrate it and that also means looking after yourself and not putting everybody else first all the time as I know teachers also do because you can't fill from your cup you need to fill from your saucer so you need to be overflowing  yourself in order to be a civic innovator for others .

 - Do you feel there are a lot of people in society and teachers as well who don't realize their potential and their range and their influence?

- Yeah this is one of my saddest things because I lived for years as an adult pretending, hiding, having imposter syndrome, just feeling all the time I don't deserve, I shouldn't be here, this is someone else's life and believing that everyone should have access to kindness and everyone is valued apart from me and I remember sort of having a thought thinking why am I so special that I am the only person on the planet that isn't valuable and everybody else is and actually when I started to stop using can't, don't, won't, should, when I noticed that in my language I would switch it so instead of saying Oh I should   be a better Mum or I should cook more fresh food or I should exercise more, I just changed it to I would like to exercise more, I would like to cook healthier meals and even that small shift changed what I could achieve, But what I see all the time is People living in this story, they tell themselves that it is a story from their Past, any trauma however big or small, A relationship  breaking up or a child that you can't connect with, your own child that you have had a problem with or feeling bullied at some stage can create a story about yourself and the story you tell about yourself isn't the truth about you, it’s a past fact and actually it limits us it’s a limiting thought its limiting language and behavior and what it means is we are all walking around, other people could benefit from our vulnerability and authenticity but we are too afraid, we are led by fear, and fear, You can't grow from fear and shame, It's not a fertile garden, You have to be able to say, What is the truth ? , what is the truth about me and stand on that and a great way to do it, I've actually got cards that I give out, I give a card to someone and it says the truth about me By whoever, they hand it to someone well and they write on the back something that is true about that person and you keep it with you and when you are thinking that I am just useless , you get the card out and go "Oh That's the truth about me" and you stand on that truth. 

 - What motivates you ?

 - That's a good question, You know what at first I thought it was this desire not to hide anymore, it was like knowing that if I could be open and honest about who I was and why I do what I do, Then I would feel , Because I was doing literacy, I have been doing literacy for 25 years and people would come up to me and say "OH it's amazing what you have done, its changed our school, its changed our town, we've done this , I was traveling abroad and "Oh you have changed our country and the government" and I am like " Yeah that’s great" and it was good but I knew I wasn't being honest with myself about why I was doing it because I was hiding, I was ashamed, I was scared of what people would think about me  if I told the truth, So at the beginning what motivated me was like I want to be honest, I want to stop hiding, I want to stop feeling ashamed and then as the apprentice TV show came out My youngest Baby brother who is one down from me took a heroin overdose and died and I mean if you have lost someone it Just, it doesn't matter how much you know about what happens after they die it still just tears you in half and there was a point after that I was standing at the sink washing up and suddenly thought No, No it's not OK, I have to do something because I know how to survive, I know what it takes to get through and I am not sharing it so it is like me finishing a race and celebrating and there is people collapsed at the second lap and I know something that can help them and I am not sharing it, Its wrong and it was just this real "It's Not OK" and I am going to do something about that, So this is kind of redemptive I think, It's me sort of saying you know, There is more, I'm not going to settle for myself or anyone   saying do you know what I am not good enough Because that is just not the truth.

 - How have you been able to inspire teachers here in the holy land ?

 - I think I have been more inspired than inspiring them, What I have met especially at this school is people who have such a heart for supporting and helping and you know teaching in the Holy Land and teachers all over the place have one thing in common, they all put in above and beyond what is needed to try and do their best and that costs them, It costs them in their own health, it costs them in their own personal lives , I know I was teaching like and my children drew a picture of our family, they drew Daddy and the other 3 kids and Jacob then he drew me and I was on my laptop (Laughs ) and I was like "Oh no I've got to change this" But I think  One of the ways that I hope that I have inspired them is to just take on board the agency and capacity you have, it's not about being the best of everything, It's about your personal best, and one thing I do I give teachers a badge at the end of training and there are 4 very powerful words on that badge, 4 words to stand by and it says " Our work changes lives". And I say I only want you to wear this If you believe it  and if you do believe it and you do wear it then you need to start owning it, So that is one of the things that I hope I have inspired them to take on, Ownership of what incredible gift they bring when they teach.

 - Now you were on the TV show The Apprentice, Why did you go on the show ?

- (Laughs) Because I am an idiot, No, I have this thing, My Granddad fought in world war 2 and I grew up with my Nan and Granddad for some of the time and my Granddad always used to say "You volunteer, If something needs to be done you step forward, you don't step back". So I have got this habit of saying Yes first and working out the details after . And as I was watching the apprentice I was doing a spelling scheme for a school and I was watching TV and I was getting really armchair expert, "Oh I could do better than that, You guys aren't very good, This is ridiculous" And before I knew it I had applied and got on the show, I actually forgot to tell my husband, I had to come back from the auditions and say " I am actually going to be away for 2 months are you OK to look after the kids." (laughs) so I got on because I thought well why not me, I have spent my whole life thinking "why Me, Why Me, The world owes me a living, Why Me", But that switched to  "well why not me, Why shouldn't I do this, Why shouldn't I run for President". And yeah it might not work but failure is how you learn, I am comfortable with things going wrong, and good job because I was home within a week of being on the show.

 - Did it inspire you and was it enjoyable being on the show?

 - That is a good question, Enjoyable ! , It’s a bit like being incarcerated because they take it very seriously, You can't tell anyone you are going on , You're not allowed to go to the toilet on your own, you're not allowed a pen, so because writing for me is so important, I found it quite hard but what I did enjoy is being with an eclectic group of people who I would never get to speak to or know and of the people there they do pick people who are quite, sometimes young I think I am the eldest that has ever been on the show and they are so full of bolster and "I am going to be the Next Alan Sugar"(Alan Sugar is a big businessman in the UK and the star of the Apprentice TV show) but underneath it all there the same as us you know they worry, they want to be happy, they're scared , so that was great because I love these kind of social experiments where you live in a house and people have to form a community, so for the short time I was there it was very enjoyable but I think I have enjoyed being fired and being out, One of my friends sent me an email when I got fired and said "congratulations you don't have to put up with it now for the next 12 weeks ". But yeah I mean I have enjoyed after more than I enjoyed there but I am glad of it I feel like it's been a great experience.

 - Now you put yourself forward as project manager, what was your project?

 - Yes I put myself forward as project manager again because Alan Sugar said "We need a volunteer" I said "I'll do it" so we had to sell a lot of I would call it tut and rubbish, My kids would call it Precious souvenirs(Laughs) and it was like lucky Chinese cats, You know the cats that you have in china town and mugs and cat litter, toilet rolls  Just odd random things and we picked them up from Tilbury docks at 3am in the morning and we had to get rid of them all by 8pm that night so we went to the flower market in London, we're going to the big markets, we're phoning Battersea dogs home, and my biggest mistake was that I took my Lucky cats to China town at 6am in the morning when China town isn't open, Just a hint for anyone who is thinking of going there, also they already get their lucky cats from China at a very cheap price, so it was a really huge mistake, and I have still got them all in my garage.

 - What is Alan Sugar like ? "(Alan Sugar is a big businessman in the UK and the star of the Apprentice TV show)

 - Well you know this is interesting Because I always think, when I sort of  meet someone    who I feel is a little bit abrasive I always say to myself "Jaz, What would you do, What would you think , what would you feel, what would you say if you were able to be compassionate right in this moment" and Alan Sugar is quite abrasive Because he doesn't say Please or Thank you or sorry and he has got one tone and he kind of frowns all the time, It's like he is expecting to be disappointed all the time, But actually  Even Off set he is exactly the same, He is very authentic, that’s just his range of emotion is there and he just wants things done. I think he has got this thing he doesn't suffer fools gladly, so the party at the end he was there and he was just in the same mode as in the board room (Laughs) He was the same sort of guy, he doesn't, I don't think I ever saw him smile the entire time, But he is a straight up guy, What you see is what you get.

 - Now teaching is a very difficult profession to be in today and family seems to have broken down so much, Is a teacher a sort of glue that holds a child together.

 - Yeah, you know what for me Its more than glue, because when you have things at home going on, where a break up, even when it's done beautifully, even when it's done with as much compassion and empathy as possible it's still a disruption of home and of life and kind of acknowledging belonging really and what teachers often don't realize is that they are there every day, they see the children, 6 hours they spend with the children every day and children are like video cameras, there like recording everything you say and do and they are working out, "is that what she really thinks, is that what she really feels"  So they are looking for data the whole time to see if, Is this OK, am I OK, Is everything OK and so teachers they are so much more than glue , because they are like this stable, like an oak tree, like a light that never goes out, like a lighthouse, that you can be drawn towards and you know that you are safe. You're not going to crash into the rocks, You're not going to drift out to sea because that lighthouse is driving you towards consistency, safety , I talk about teachers having ace relationships, which is being there authentic selves, being consistent in the fact that they are always there and having high expectations, not letting the fact that OK well things are hard at home but I still expect you to do well because I believe in you and those three things, those ace relationships, there the reason that I am not dead, they really are, I have searched my life, I have gone back and thought "how have I survived? How have I done this ?" In all the therapy and counseling and the coaching that I have had  and I have given to other people, I just keep coming back to Its those 5 teachers and a surrounding cast of accidental saviors But those 5 teachers were the glue were the thread of life that kind of kept me going all the way.

 - What would you say to a young person setting off on their journey    of life today ?

- Strap yourself in Kid, (laughs) well I would say "aim for failure, aim for epic failure, fail first, fail fast, don't be failure averse, don't be driven by fear " because you can't get the success until you've failed.

Often I ask people "who's made a mistake today" and people are sort of  (mumbling) and I think you know what if you haven't made a mistake then you're not trying hard enough, you're staying in your comfort zone, it's all about growth and contribution can only happen when you're making mistakes, Now don't make huge mistakes like robbing a bank or kidnapping a whole city, don't do that but take risks that you think "you know I don't know if this is going to work, I don't know if someone has successfully done it before But the current situation isn't the best it could be and I am going to go for it" That’s the sort of risk and what you find is when you do that people come with you. Everyone is waiting for one person to say "Let's give it a go so that they can join as well " So I would say re brand failure so that it is your super power, so that you can become a failure Ninja, you can really grasp all those things that frighten you and your afraid of because everything you want is on the other side of your fear, so dance with it go straight through it and get there.

- Are you making a difference ?

 - Yes I am making a difference, I am making a difference because I get so many fantastic emails and tweets and when I speak at keynotes when I travel around the world people come up to me afterwards, I'm making a huge difference and what I hope is that, Half the time I want to get involved in people's lives and I want to walk with them for the rest of the time but what I know and what I hope and what I expect is the difference I make is a catalyst for change, and people say to me you know "Because of what I have heard, I want to live my life differently" and that is what I want to do, that is what everyone else has done for me and I just want to, that’s what a good one looks like, and the way I thank the people who invested in me and changed my life is by passing that forward to someone else, So yeah  I think I am.